I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
