i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Randomize
