Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
