can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize