marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I love having hate sex.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Randomize
