Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I need to calm my uterus...
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize