It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
