And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
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