One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize