idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
