im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
