You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
