I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Randomize
