There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
