Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
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