Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
