one might say we're banned from that church
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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