Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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