my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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