singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I'm getting married
To pizza
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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