i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I am naked and annoyed.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize