We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
