Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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