We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
