is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
You may now shotgun with the bride
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
