paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
No I am not eating basil off your cock
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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