I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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