Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
