Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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