Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Randomize
