he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
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