I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
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