What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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