Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
