Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
So. Much. Porn.
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