You really coming over, don't trick.
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
