Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize