Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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