sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
