May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Randomize
