The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
