It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
