I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
