somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
