More tranny stories later!
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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