He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
