doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Panties = found
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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