R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Just invented taco cereal.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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