I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
