That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
