her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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