We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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