I think i sorta joined a cult last night
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
