i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
